I've been reading various books on dating, how men and women view the world, how to find happiness, and how to avoid falling in love with a jerk. I've love reading in general, but reading something so pertaining to this stage of my life is rather enjoyable. However, through all of the passages and chapters I read, I am left with thinking, "how am I supposed to remember all of this?" Being back in the dating scene has been confusing, exhilarating, flattering, and exhausting. My hope is now that I have experienced relationships that most others in the single scene haven't, that I can use that knowledge to date more efficinelty and effectively. However, even the thought of dating efficiently and effectively, well that sounds like a business proposal, calculated and emotionless. Perhaps my tendency to want to reach my goals in life gets in the way of being more relaxed about life. I know I have a tendency to be a Type A personality and this is the way I was created, but I really try my best to enjoy the journey instead of the destination.
So what is my journey and what is my destination? My journey is gaining life experiences and knowledge, meeting new people, having fun, and hopefully being a good friend to others. What is my destination? Quite simply, happiness-lasting happiness. Preferably sharing my life with someone that treats me well, a satisfying relationship that encourages me to be my best self, doing something that gives me purpose, giving to others 110%, and being happy with the person I am in life.
Sometimes during my "journey" all the emotions that go along with dating are rather exhausting and perhaps my reason for writing down my inner ramblings. I am a
It's days like today, that as I walk amongst hundreds and hundreds of other students on campus that I feel so alone, despite being surrounded by so many people. The past few weeks I've been learning so much, pondering my life, and as I walk through the halls I put my headphones in and crank up my music. I don't feel like chatting, I feel like letting the music speak to my soul. At times when no words can seem to soothe me, I crank my music loud to mute my mind and feel the beat, hoping it will resonate some feelings. That is what I love about music. It is so spiritual to me-helps me feel emotions when I don't feel like feeling and when I want to feel emotions it amplifies them. When I'm in the mood to sing I sing along (which is 99% of the time) and the other 1% of the time I can just listen and let it express the feelings I can't seem to speak. Oh music! What would I do without you and your beautiful melodies and verses? Back to being surrounded by so many people and feeling alone. I can't help but think as I am surrounded by so many people, strangers, people that I will never know, it's beautiful! I am just one person out of so many billions of people that are living. I can walk around, not talk to anyone, people watch, listen to music, and just ponder my silly thoughts to myself. I wonder what other people are thinking about, what their stresses are, and count my blessings that I live such a good life with a positive and optimistic outlook. Okay, so today my thoughts are not as cherry and bright as they are everyday, but it's healthy to experience an array of emotions in order to appreciate the absolutely happy days. Over 3/4 of my days are filled with waking up happy, loving life, appreciating the simple pleasures, feeling blessed, and going to bed happy.
So on this exception of a day, what do I do? I let myself ponder for a few hours, maybe reflect a bit, and then I decide to be happy. So that's it...I'm getting off my deep thinking, lost in thought, soapbox of an attitude and deciding to have a great day. That's it! I believe in putting positive energy into the world and receiving back-it always works and makes my days positive. I hope you all have a wonderful day! You are loved, thought of, admired, and treasured by so many. In fact, if you are reading this my life has probably been better because of you. So thank you! If for any reason you are feeling the way I was before I wrote this, decide now to feel better. Soothe your soul with music, cupcakes (one of my less effective techniques), or whatever speaks to you. Whatever it may be, feel the emotions and then let go of them. You are AMAZING! Have a great day!
Calissa
Calissa, I LOVE this post. I can remember feeling many similar things as I was single. Although I have not been divorced watching my parents go through a divorce definitely left me with a few scars.
ReplyDeleteHowever, one idea that has seemed to help me over the years is D&C 3:1-3:
“The works, and the designs, and the purposes of God cannot be frustrated, neither can they come to naught.
“For God doth not walk in crooked paths, … neither doth he vary from that which he hath said, therefore his paths are straight, and his course is one eternal round.
“Remember … that it is not the work of God that is frustrated, but the work of men”
So when dating seems a little overwhelming and you are worried about remembering all the good dating advice you have come across, remember that your job is to remain worthy of the Spirit and all those things you have come across in the past will come to you as needed. The "right guy" isn't going to be scared off if you don't text him soon enough or too soon. God's purposes and designs cannot be frustrated. So let God worry about the Type A stuff and when the time is right don't forget that falling in love is fun.
Thanks for that kind and heartfelt insight Heather!
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